Ode to a Vitamix

Oh Vitamix, how I adore and covet thee. Truly, you are sovereign over all other kitchen appliances.

I have a serious case of blender envy. All the cool kids have a Vitamix blender. Even Handsome Husband’s Grandpapa has one. Would it be terribly inappropriate for me to ask him to will it to me? Too forward? I would love to inherit it.

Why, oh why are they so stinking expensive?! Actually, I know why: they are just plain amazing. Perhaps the friendly folks over at Vitamix would allow me to trade a kidney for one??

Each morning, I drag out my Walmart blender and concoct some mystery blend of kombucha or coconut water or fresh juice with vegetables and frozen organic berries (quality fresh ones are hard to come by most months here in the frigid tundra that is Montana). Sometimes I add greek yogurt, sometimes not. I shake, wrestle and curse my cheap blender for about 20 minutes until the contents of our smoothies are mostly blended. It’s not pretty, but it’s worth it. My girls eagerly suck them down. Husband is more reluctant, having spied me sneaking in the likes of leftover spaghetti squash (surprisingly delicious!) or my old standby: a generous handful of organic baby spinach.

I’m admittedly hard on blenders, we don’t mess around in my kitchen. I’ve probably gone through more than ten of them in my adult life. I’ve shattered glass carafes full of pancake batter, broken blades off into fresh salsa, and blown out motors like a Boss. It’s not lost on me that I’ve probably spent as much on cheap blenders as one quality Vitamix, over the years. Hindsight really is 20/20.

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Tales from the blender graveyard: I got our smoothie ingredients all loaded and

THEN my blender broke. I despise wasting food. Especially organic food.

I expect I’ll be using our blender even more often once New Brother arrives. With his unrepaired cleft palate, I suspect blending nutritious foods will be preferable, and easier for him to consume than most solids. Even after his surgery, there will be a period of time when he’ll be on a liquid only diet as he recovers.

Husband, if you are reading this, keep in mind that Mother’s Day is in May and both our anniversary and my birthday are in June. (I’m sure you remembered.) Consider this a great big hint as to an outstanding gift for your adoring wife and children. *wink*


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